Monday, 9 November 2020

New Disney ad will make you believe holiday magic still exists — even in troubling times



Given the amount of attention being taken up by the global pandemic and recent election, it's easy to forget the holiday season is upon us. Although this season looks to be a lot different than previous years, a new ad from Disney shows the magic isn't completely gone.

Disney's 2020 Christmas ad tells the story of a woman named Lola who received a Mickey Mouse stuffed toy as a young girl. Sixty-five years later, she's able to share the vintage toy with her granddaughter who cuddles the plush mouse while making Christmas decorations.

As the years ago by, Lola's granddaughter becomes less interested in family holiday traditions. But one magical night she reminds her grandmother how important they are to her in the most beautiful way.

Grab a tissue.


FROM OUR FAMILY TO YOURS | Disney Christmas Advert 2020 | Official Disney UK www.youtube.com


The song playing behind the video is "Love Is A Compass" by 19-year-old British musician Griff.

"Right now, at this time, it feels very timely and people are going to watch it and crave to be together and want to be together," she told PA News Agency. "It's so important to give a message of hope and realize that we will all reconnect at some point. When I watched it I just loved it."

"Love Is A Compass" is available now with all proceeds going to Make-A-Wish.



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posted by HDM News @ November 09, 2020   0 Comments

People are overwhelming Trump's voter fraud hotline with hilarious prank calls



In one of the least shocking developments in recent political history, Donald Trump is claiming the reason he lost the election to Joe Biden is because of widespread voter fraud.

This move has been a part of his election playbook for the entire campaign. He was screaming about the likelihood of fraud for months before Election Day.

For Trump, it appears he figured the only way to win the election is by taking it out of the hands of voters and handing it to the conservative-leaning Supreme Court.

His campaign hopes that its fraud claims will ignite a legal battle that sets the plan in motion.

Even though Biden's victory is all but assured, Trump has yet to admit defeat because of his conspiratorial claims. "We're hearing stories that are horror stories," Trump said. "We think there is going to be a lot of litigation because we have so much evidence and so much proof."

"Democrat officials never believed they could win this election honestly," Trump said in a press conference Thursday. "That's why they did the mail-in ballots, where there's tremendous corruption and fraud going on."

The only problem is, according to independent fact-checkers, there is zero evidence of voter fraud.

"Trump has produced no evidence of systemic problems in voting or counting," an Associated Press fact-check states. "In fact, the ballot-counting process across the country has been running smoothly for the most part, even with the U.S. in the throes of the coronavirus pandemic."

To whip up some evidence for Trump's unfounded claims, his campaign created a hotline for people to report voter suppression, irregularities, or fraud. "Tell us what you are seeing," a tweet promoting the hotline reads.

Since the hotline launched it has been inundated with calls. However, unfortunately for Trump, they are mostly prank calls. The hotline has been so overwhelmed by jokesters the phone number has been changed three times.


According to ABC News, the hotline has become a "nightmare" for some staffers.

Comedian James Mwaura called the line to report something seriously troubling he witnessed at his polling site.

This guy proves the oft-repeated conspiracy theory that countless dead people voted for Biden.


She saw something truly frightening when she voted down in Georgia.


@caitlynjk95 ######
♬ The Devil Went Down to Georgia - The Charlie Daniels Band


This voter recalled one of the most epic sagas of the '80s.


This guy found over 100,000 ballots burned in his firepit. But that's not his biggest concern.


The bees don't care about Trump's hotline.



Some people used the hotline to engage in some glorious schadenfreude.



This woman called in quoting Anderson Cooper.




from Upworthy https://ift.tt/3eKIgEE

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posted by HDM News @ November 09, 2020   0 Comments

Monday, 2 November 2020

As we help people cope with chaos and uncertainty, therapists are struggling too



Americans are facing uncertainty, and it's starting to seem as if uncertainty is the norm. Over the past eight months we have battled the never ending war with COVID, started, stopped and restarted virtual school, and witnessed the reanimation of a civil rights movement. We've watched daily as news outlets recount death tolls and survival numbers for the pandemic, all while trying to give our family a semblance of normalcy, but nothing about this is normal and the helpers we are used to turning to are burning the wicks at both ends.

In today's climate, therapists are battling the same battles as our patients. Once upon a time before COVID, our stressors would occasionally overlap, but in recent months the stressors are exactly the same as the majority of our clients. Therapists are encouraging our clients to do the very basics to keep from spiraling into a depression, all while we struggle to change out of our pajama bottoms for virtual sessions. At times it's difficult to put aside your own personal struggles to focus on the needs of our clients, but we still show up.

We keep showing up ready to hold space even though our own cups are empty, but the fear of the election outcome is a different level of connectedness that we as therapists were not prepared for. The fear around elections is not new, of course; we navigated this in 2016. But with the very palpable division in our country, our clients are scared. They're scared of either outcome, and so are we.

Communities of color are turning to therapists to help them not only navigate the continued shootings of unarmed Black and brown men by police, but to also have a safe place to express their fears and anxieties around the election. The state of the country is shaky, to put it mildly, for our minority communities. This includes increased depression and anxiety rates in LGBTQ+ communities as well. It seems as if therapists have noticed a collective holding of breath, and yet we also sit not breathing, waiting for the shoe to drop.

Therapists are not immune from current events. In fact, it's in many of our codes of ethics to be updated and actively advocating for things that are or will negatively affect our clients. Our clients are seeing news reports of the lines wrapped around sporting goods stores to purchase ammo and calls for a civil war should the election swing the pendulum toward the other direction. We sit in uncomfortable fear while our clients pour their hearts out, expecting us to have the answer. But we weren't trained for pandemic counseling in a tumultuous election year while the country is literally on fire. There was not a class for that.

We are sitting across from clients via screen or in person empathizing with their fear while experiencing the same gut-punching terror. We are getting hung up on what coping skills to suggest because we've tried them and they're not working for us, so we hesitate to suggest them to you. Of course, a brave face is put on display and we walk through mindfulness exercises to help ground you to the present moment, but in reality, the present moment is filled with uncertainty and doubt. When the only way out is through, we have to give our clients the tools to push through.

Therapy still works, even if at times your therapist may look haggard. We want you in our office, physical or virtually. This state that we're in is hard for everyone. It's important to know you're not alone and to develop the tools you need to push through to the other side of this election and beyond.

It's natural to have fear when nothing seems certain. We've been living in a heightened sense of survival for an extended period of time, and our brains are just not equipped to thrive in fight or flight for that long. So rest, talk to someone, and give yourself permission to feel whatever you're feeling. Even your therapist needs to do that right now.



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posted by HDM News @ November 02, 2020   0 Comments

Single dad adopts five siblings so they'll never be separated again



Robert Carter is an amazing example of someone who took the pain from their childhood and used it as inspiration to help those in a similar circumstance as an adult.

At the age of 12, Carter was placed in foster care in Hamilton County, Ohio because his mother struggled with alcoholism and was unable to care for him and his eight siblings. Once he was emancipated, he adopted two of his younger siblings he hadn't seen for years.

"My mom had nine kids, and I didn't see my youngest again. He was two. I didn't see him again until he was 16, so for me going through that, I knew how important it is for them to see each other and be around each other," Carter said according to FOX19.


via WSAZ

In December 2019, Carter began fostering three brothers, Robert Jr., Giovanni, and Kiontae. Later, he learned they had two sisters, Marionna and Makayla, in the foster system as well.

"When I had my boys before I got the girls, that's all they talked about was their sisters," Carter said.

The three boys and two girls had been separated for six months, so when Carter and the girls' foster parents brought the children together, there was an outpouring of emotion.

"We met up for visits, and all the kids were crying," Carter said. "They didn't want to leave each other, and at that moment, I knew, ok, I have to adopt all five."

via WSAZ

So Carter worked hard to afford a larger house for all five children and last Friday, on Adoption Day in Hamilton County, Carter became their father.

"I've never had a single father adopt five children," Adoption case manager Stacey Barton said. "I've had married couples who have adopted six or seven, so this was a unique experience for me. Children need families, and it's an opportunity for Mr. Carter to show the community that he can do it and others can too."

via WSAZ

While it's beautiful that the entire family is back together, the transition hasn't been perfect. But, as any parent knows, that's par for the course. Carter says it took his daughter, Marionna, a little while to warm up to him.

"At first, she didn't like me," he admits. "But eventually, she came around. She walked in my room last night and said, 'I just want to say thanks for taking us in and taking care of us when our real mom couldn't.' It just really touched me."

Having personal experience in the foster care system has given Carter a deep understanding of what his children are going through so he knows how important it is to make them feel secure after so much chaos.

He says his new job is "making memories to replace a lot of the bad ones." Carter said. "Every night I talk to them and let them know, 'I'm your dad forever. I know what it's like and I'm always here for you.'"



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posted by HDM News @ November 02, 2020   0 Comments

Judge offers alternative sentences to young offenders like 'get your grades up' and 'vote'



Judge Carlos Moore has a unique approach to the justice system in which he serves—one that many people find refreshing.

Moore is a municipal judge and attorney in Mississippi. He's also the President-elect of the National Bar Association and is listed as a "Rising Star" in African-American Leadership Magazine's 2020 Top 100 Influential African-American Leaders list. In 2017, he made national news when the first thing he did after being sworn in was remove the Mississippi state flag from his courtroom. (Up until this year, the Mississippi state flag had the confederate flag, widely seen as a symbol of white supremacy, as part of its design.)

Unafraid to take bold steps to ensure justice is served in a way that actually improves people's lives. One way he does that is using alternative sentencing—giving unique, creative, individualized consequences instead of standard fines or jail time.

Moore wrote in an Instagram post:

"As a judge I love alternative sentencing especially for young people. Today I announced that I would give an 18 year old young lady a break on a speeding ticket if she brings me back proof that she voted in next Tuesday's general election or writes 500 word essay on the importance of voting. Then I told a young 17 year old man that if he pulled up one of his Cs to a B by his next report card I would withhold adjudication on a misdemeanor ticket. Our young people are our greatest treasure and if I can encourage them to be their best and do their best I'm happy."

"I believe in alternative sentencing especially when dealing with young people who have accepted responsibility for their wrongs," Moore told Upworthy. "I believe that by giving the young people unexpected choices or alternatives to jail or a fine I can have a bigger impact on their lives and futures. I really favor rehabilitation over pure punishment."

Moore's approach has fans. As psychiatrist and author James Gilligan wrote in the New York Times in 2012, "If any other institutions in America were as unsuccessful in achieving their ostensible purpose as our prisons are, we would shut them down tomorrow." Alternative sentencing such as community service or restitution—or more creative options such as Moore's "get your grades up" or "show me you understand civic duty"—appeals to those of us who understand that punitive measures are not always the most effective. A study from the Macarthur Foundation found that when people are informed that rehabilitation is more effective than incarceration, people were willing to pay more in taxes to support it.

Rehabilitation also saves money overall. In an article in The Conversation, Siddhartha Bandyopadhyay, a professor of economics at the University of Birmingham, wrote that community sentences cost on average a quarter of the amount as prison sentences and reduce crime more than prison sentences do.

But for Moore, alternative sentencing is primarily about what's going to be best for the young person in front of his bench.

"I want all that appear before me to be better upon and after meeting me than before doing the same," he says, adding, "I think anyone who administers justice must also know how to show mercy."

Justice must be served, but justice doesn't automatically mean handing down harsh punishments. Providing young people an incentive to improve is perhaps the best way to prevent crime—it requires them to take responsibility while simultaneously instilling hope and faith in their own futures.

More of this wholesome, reasonable approach to criminal justice, please, and thank you for providing the example, Judge Moore. We love to see it.



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posted by HDM News @ November 02, 2020   0 Comments

Monday, 26 October 2020

A 'Cha Cha Slide' dance party broke out amongst people waiting to vote in Philadelphia



Election Day is a special occasion where Americans of all walks of life come together to collectively make important decisions about the country's future. Although we do it together as a community, it's usually a pretty formal affair.

People tend to stand quietly in line, clutching their voter guides. Politics can be a touchy subject, so most usually stand in line like they're waiting to have their number called at the DMV.

However, a group of voters in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania received a lot of love on social media on Sunday for bringing a newfound sense of joy to the voting process.



Videos circulating online showed groups of dancers doing the "Cha Cha Slide" by DJ Casper while waiting to cast their ballots. While it looked like an impromptu display by bored voters making the best of the long line, it was actually the work of Nelini Stamp, 32, the director of the strategy for the Working Families Party and the campaign director for Election Defenders.

The nonpartisan coalition's goal is to help voters stay "staying safe and healthy outside of polling places across the country and bringing them some joy."

"Because voter suppression has been rampant for years, because there has been so much in the media and so much out there about white supremacists and militia intimidation tactics, we figured that this was a year to make sure that people felt motivated to go vote and not feel unsafe," Stamp told BuzzFeed News.

"Especially in the middle of a global pandemic," she added.

The coalition's work also includes training thousands of people in de-escalation tactics to combat voter intimidation at the polls. Stamp believes that the joyous, calming effect music has on people helps with de-escalating a potentially stressful situation because it "centers the mood in something else."

The viral cha-cha dance was courtesy of Joy to the Polls, a concert put on by the coalition to entertain voters waiting in line. The Resistance Revival Chorus, a group of women and nonbinary activists dressed in white, joined in the festivities by dancing alongside the voters in an adjacent parking lot.

The joyous moment showed that with an inspired community organization, even standing in a two-hour-long polling line can be fun. But it also calls attention to a larger problem in American democracy: long polling lines.

"That person should not have to have to wait in line for an hour," Stamp said.

"However, we wanted to do something good for those people [standing in line]," she said. "And it felt really good that that person and those folks who saw — whether it was the Cha Cha Slide or the Wobble or people doing the Electric Slide, it at least brought them some joy and some relief in a process that wasn't meant for us, especially Black and brown people."

Studies show that voters in primarily Black neighborhoods wait for 29% longer than those in primarily white neighborhoods. They are also about 74% more likely to wait more than half an hour.

There will be fewer polling places in Philadelphia this year, compared to most. There are normally 830 open on election day, but this year there will only be 718. Some of this is due to the COVID-19 pandemic and the understanding that more people will be voting by mail.

This mirrors the reduction in polling places throughout the country. Over 21,000 polling places have been eliminated across the country this year. That's a 20% drop compared to 2016. Vice attributes these closure to "a heavy shift to mail voting, coronavirus-related consolidations, cost-cutting measures, and voter suppression."



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posted by HDM News @ October 26, 2020   0 Comments

Friday, 23 October 2020

We're 11 days out from the election. So, let's talk about Hillary Clinton. No, seriously.



Yesterday I was perusing comments on an Upworthy article about Joe Biden comforting the son of a Parkland shooting victim and immediately had flashbacks to the lead-up of the 2016 election. In describing former vice President Biden, some commenters were using the words "criminal," "corrupt," and "pedophile—exactly the same words people used to describe Hillary Clinton in 2016.

I remember being baffled so many people were so convinced of Clinton's evil schemes that they genuinely saw the documented serial liar and cheat that she was running against as the lesser of two evils. I mean, sure, if you believe that a career politician had spent years being paid off by powerful people and was trafficking children to suck their blood in her free time, just about anything looks like a better alternative.

But none of that was true.

It's been four years and Hillary Clinton has been found guilty of exactly none of the criminal activity she was being accused of. Trump spent every campaign rally leading chants of "Lock her up!" under the guise that she was going to go to jail after the election. He's been president for nearly four years now, and where is Clinton? Not in jail—she's comfy at home, occasionally trolling Trump on Twitter and doing podcasts.

Every accusation that had any possible truth to it has been investigated by the Trump administration and by Republicans in Congress, and guess what—Clinton has still not been charged or indicted for one damn thing. Why? Because there's nothing there to indict her for.

It's not like she hasn't been investigated thoroughly—by her opponents—for her handling of classified emails and her role in Benghazi and cleared of any wrongdoing. It's not like Trump hasn't had a chance to send the full power of the law enforcement he has at his disposal after her. It's not like there aren't Republicans in power who would love nothing more than to see her behind bars.

But that hasn't happened. If she were guilty of the stuff she's been accused of, she'd be in prison. And she's not.

Yet people persisted like mad in their assertions that she was a criminal.. Now we're seeing same kinds of disinformation campaigns being waged against Joe Biden, mainly through his son, Hunter. And make no mistake, it's a purposeful strategy. Trump's former adviser Steve Bannon succinctly explained that the key to manipulating the media—and by extension, the public—is to "flood the zone with sh*t." You provide a tsunami of junk news, with just enough tiny nuggets of truth that people don't know what to believe, and in such high volumes that wading through it all to try to discern what's true is impossible.

The fact of the matter is that the Hunter Biden stories that have gotten Trumpland all foamy at the mouth have not proven to have news legs. The reporter who wrote it up for The New York Post—a tabloid paper that already didn't have a great journalistic reputation—reportedly refused to put his name on it. But that hasn't stopped people from sharing it like it's gospel truth.

NBC News did a really great in-depth investigative report on the super sketchy origins of the Hunter Biden story, but of course the people who need to read it won't, because they think NBC is fake news. (The number of people who think real journalistic news is "fake news," while simultaneously believing that blatantly biased fringe outlets are real news is baffling. But that's where we are—up is down, left is right, and fiction is "alternative fact" in the disinformation age.)

For what it's worth, The Wall Street Journal—one of the most reputable journalistic news sources out there, and one that can't be accused of being biased to the left due to its right-leaning editorial board—reported yesterday that their review of the documents showed Joe Biden playing no role in the business ventures of his son. And yet the Breitbarts and the Infowars and the other myriad right-wing outlets just keep on running with it, knowing that the actual truth doesn't really matter if people think something is true—more more accurately if people want to believe it's true.

Of course, disinformation campaigns aren't new, especially on the right-wing side of the aisle. In 2004, John Kerry famously had his Vietnam record smeared by a contrived veteran group that ended up being discredited after he lost the election. In 2008, the whole "birther" movement claiming Obama wasn't born in the United States was pushed by many, including Donald Trump himself, despite the fact that it was ridiculously untrue. The only thing true about it was its racist origin.

But these last two elections, the conspiracy theories and smear campaigns have become more and more heinous. I mean, a Satan-worshiping cabal of pedophile elites? Come on, people. But it makes sense when you think about it. When you have candidate who is on tape saying he "tried to f*ck" a married woman and that he grabs women "by the p*ssy" because they let him, who paid off a porn star he had an affair with when his wife was pregnant with his child, who had to pay $2 million for misusing his charitable foundation's money for personal gain, who had to pay a $25 million settlement to students he defrauded with his "university," who is a billionaire who owes hundreds of millions of dollars and refuses to release his tax returns, and whose campaign and administration have produced indictment after indictment, and more—to make that candidate look remotely acceptable, much less desirable, you have to make his opponent look not just bad, but like evil incarnate.

That's how we've ended up with crap like "Pizzagate" and QAnon boiling up from the dark corners of the internet. If we lived in a normal era, such insane ideas would disintegrate in the light of day, but now we have people in powerful positions—including the president himself—pushing them. And with social media outlets inadvertently amplifying them, getting people to see disinformation for what it is feels like a losing battle.

This is why it's important to bring up Hillary Clinton now, 11 days before an election she's not even a part of. Because the things that people said about her in 2016 were far worse than what people claim about about Biden, and yet after four years, she's not been found guilty of a thing. The only way you can explain that is by creating some kind of elaborate, "deep state" conspiracy, and if you've slipped into that kooky world, you're probably beyond help. But if you're merely unsure or suspicious of what you've heard—which is understandable, considering how much junk information there is to sift through—just think this through. If what had been said about Hillary Clinton were true, wouldn't she be locked up by now?

For the love of all that is good and decent—literally—please don't fall for this garbage again, America. There's far too much at stake.



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posted by HDM News @ October 23, 2020   0 Comments

Wednesday, 14 October 2020

A mother's heartbreaking story highlights the challenge of defining 'late-term abortion'



Part of the problem with debating abortion legislation is that there is no clear definition of what it even is. Some might say it's the termination of an unwanted pregnancy, but sometimes a pregnancy that ends in abortion was very much wanted. Some might say it's the killing of a baby in the womb, but plenty of abortions take place after a baby has already died in utero.

Merriam-Webster defines abortion as "the termination of a pregnancy after, accompanied by, resulting in, or closely followed by the death of the embryo or fetus"—a definition that points to the following heartbreaking story and the reason why abortion is not as cut and dry an issue as many make it out to be.

Haylie Grammer shared her family's experience with "late-term abortion" in the death of her daughter, Embree, at 25 weeks, and it illustrates how abortion can look very, very different than what people imagine it to be.

Grammer wrote:

"I saw this article today about Senator Gary Peters and his abortion story. It reminded me why I am pro-choice and reminded me that people need to hear my story too. Some of you may have already heard my story, but I think it is a good reminder of how politics are used to control women's bodies and how everything isn't always what it seems on the surface.

4.5 years ago, I gave birth to my first born. Her name was Embree Eleanor Grammer. She was born via c-section on April 25, 2016. She weighed 4lbs 4oz. She was only 25 weeks gestation. She lived for approximately 20-30 minutes. She was born with a tumor that was roughly the size of a volleyball that was invading her body both externally and internally. It was sucking her blood supply, pushing her organs out of place, deforming her body, and overworking her heart. We found out about the tumor only 5 weeks prior. In that 5 weeks the tumor grew from about the size of a walnut to the volleyball. I grew along with it, from the tiny bump of a first time mom at 20 weeks to measuring the same as a pregnant woman who was roughly 36 weeks along. In 5 weeks.

That 5 weeks was the hardest 5 weeks of my life. We had sonograms twice weekly, traveled across the state to visit more specialists, and were told that essentially our sweet Embree would probably not make it. We had a choice to make. The state of Texas allows an abortion a time period after 20 weeks if the pregnancy is life threatening to the mother or if the fetus has "abnormalities." We qualified for this. I have always been pro-choice, but I have never been pro-abortion for myself. While I agree that women have the right to do what is best for them, I myself wasn't ever planning on getting an abortion. I also had hope. Hope that Embree would be healed. Hope that the tumor would stop growing. So we chose to push on with the pregnancy, hoping that Embree would have a chance. I was counting down to the age of viability, just hoping that if I could keep Embree cooking until then, maybe.... just maybe, modern medicine and prayers could keep her alive.

We were not only closely monitoring Embree, but doctors were closely monitoring me. Even though Embree was still alive, she was not in good shape. She was developing Hydrops and I was at a risk of developing mirror syndrome. This would be life threatening to me if it fully developed. On April 22 I went to my second sonogram of the week and my doctors were concerned with the swelling in my feet. I was told that I had a decision to make. Not only was I starting to develop the beginnings of mirror syndrome, but we were 2 weeks away from 27 weeks. This was important because at 27 weeks, I would no longer be able to deliver Embree in Texas via c-section. Why? Because according to the law, by choosing to deliver Embree this early, I would be having an abortion. And while at 24.5 weeks I was still in the grey area of Texas Abortion law where I could deliver her, at 27 weeks I would not be. Surprised this is considered an abortion? Many are. Stay with me.

We decided to schedule our c-section for that Monday. I would be 25 weeks. We made it past the age of viability, but it was becoming obvious that she would not make it. We met with NICU doctors and they reviewed our case. They decided that they would not be attempting any life saving attempts on Embree after she was delivered. This meant officially, we were choosing to have an abortion. We were giving birth to our child early, knowing full well that she would not survive. This is what 'late term abortion' looks like. Catch that political buzz word? I will explain more below.

As you can imagine, this was the worst and longest weekend of our life. We knew that in 2 days we would be meeting our daughter and letting her go. But it gets so much worse. Again, this is considered an abortion. A late term abortion. The State of Texas, like most states who have a large majority who claim to be 'pro-life,' has many restrictions in place to prevent abortions from happening. Here is the thing about abortion legislation.... it doesn't differentiate between what we were going through and what the 'pro-life' groups think they are preventing. The laws in Texas stated that in order for us to give birth to Embree and have a chance to hold her while her soul still resided in her body, we had to do the following: 1. Our doctor had to apply for permission to perform the c-section from the state. This had to be done 24 hours before the surgery. We had to go to the hospital on the Saturday before we were to give birth, in the midst of our mourning, to sign a paper requesting an abortion. Put yourself in that situation. Forever, in the records of the State of Texas, there is a piece of paper that says that I aborted my precious Embree. 2. On top of filing this paperwork for us, our doctor also had to give me a pamphlet published by the State of Texas about the consequences of abortion. By law, she was required to give me a booklet that told me that if I had the abortion I would suffer from depression and anxiety for the rest of my life, have an increased risk of breast cancer, and possible be infertile in the future. Think I'm kidding? Have a look: https://hhs.texas.gov/.../women.../womans-right-to-know.pdf

If you consider yourself "pro-life" you are probably thinking something like, "yes but your situation was different. This isn't what I'm fighting against." Or maybe you're thinking "but I don't consider this abortion." Great. But the actual definition of abortion is "the termination of a pregnancy after, accompanied by, resulting in, or closely followed by the death of the embryo or fetus." So while YOU might not consider what we went through to be an "abortion," it was. I had an abortion. I had a late-term abortion.

Why am I bringing this up? Why am I telling you this? Because when lawmakers and people fight to end 'abortion,' they are talking about this too. When you hear about 'late term abortions' taking place, THIS is what is happening. It's not women who have carried babies to full term and then just deciding to have an abortion. It is women and families who are devastated that they are in a situation in which they have to decide whether to let a child suffer in the womb, or end their suffering. 'Pro-life' laws are designed to make this process difficult. They are designed to put obstacles in place. This process is already difficult enough. Even women who are deciding to have an abortion at 8 weeks. It's already a hard decision so why are we allowing people to torture them too. Every time people talk about saving the babies and being pro-life, I cringe on the inside. Not because I don't want to save babies, but because I want to save babies. Save babies from suffering that they are made to endure because some man who has no medical training has decided that he knows women's bodies better than doctors. I cringe because I know as a survivor of these terrible 'pro-life' laws that these laws are being used to trick women in America to vote against their own interest in hopes that they are saving the unborn. I cringe every time I hear people call those who vote in favor of Pro-Choice laws... 'murderers,' because they are saying I murdered my Embree.

I chose to deliver Embree on April 25, 2016 via c-section. I chose late-term abortion. I did so because it was the only way I could hold my baby girl while she was still alive. It was the only way I could encounter her soul until we are together again in heaven. This is why I am Pro-choice. Remember Embree and I when you vote."

If your first response to this story is, "But that's not abortion!" you're not just incorrect, you've also missed the point. Due to the circumstances and the laws of the state she was in, yes, this was legally considered an abortion. And if you think it shouldn't be, who do you think should make that decision? Who gets to define abortion so that it accounts for the millions of different individual circumstances that come into play? Most of us don't even want the government deciding which doctors we can go to—do we really want elected officials with no medical training making decisions about our specific, personal medical care?

Grammer isn't alone in sharing personal abortion stories that people don't think of as abortion. The families who desperately wanted a baby, who ended up having to make the rock-and-a-hard-place choice to abort because the alternative would have been a short, pain-filled life for their child. The mothers having to endure long, drawn out, potentially dangerous miscarriages and being forced to carry a dead baby inside of them because abortion restrictions gave them no other choice.

Some might say that these stories and experiences are not the norm, but they actually are when it comes to late-term abortion. Third trimester abortions are medical choices that aren't easy for any individual or family, and they are situations that medical professionals and patients need to make together, not the government. Pete Buttigieg said it beautifully: "The bottom line is, as horrible as that choice is, that woman, that family may seek spiritual guidance, they may seek medical guidance, but that decision is not going to be made any better, medically or morally, because the government is dictating how that decision should be made."



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posted by HDM News @ October 14, 2020   0 Comments

Thursday, 8 October 2020

A writer imagined a scene from 'The West Wing' the day Trump caught COVID—and she nailed it



The day after the 2016 election, I started rewatching The West Wing on Netflix. I guess I wanted to keep a sane, if somewhat idealized, version of the presidency and the White House within my vision. Martin Sheen as the down-to-earth yet dignified and devout President Jed Bartlett has comforted me since the series first aired, and the cast of characters serving in his cabinet almost feel like familiar old friends.

So when a friend shared a fanfic-style 2020 West Wing scene, I was intrigued. By the time I finished it, I was highly impressed and thoroughly delighted.

Los Angeles-based TV writer Jelena Woehr posted the script in a Twitter thread last week, the day Trump was diagnosed with COVID-19. The scene opens with former President Bartlett obviously just reading the news of the diagnosis and telling his wife Abby about it. The phone conversations that ensue are remarkably true to the show's writing and characters—like, you can actually hear their voices as you read it. Woehr nails the show so thoroughly it's almost spooky.

Here's Woehr's whole WW2020 thread, shared directly as written. Enjoy.

JED BARTLETT: *peering at news* Abby, did you see this?

ABBY: don't get your blood pressure up. it's not your concern anymore.

JED: well, of course it is. can't a man be interested in current events?

ABBY: just tell me you won't call--

JED: get Toby on the phone, will you?

TOBY: yes, sir, I've heard.

JED: do you think he's faking it?

TOBY: no, sir, I don't. I don't think his ego would allow it.

JED: should I make a statement?

TOBY: what kind of statement, sir?

JED: I don't know. "I told you so?"

TOBY: no, I don't think you should say that.

JED: have you talked to C.J.?

TOBY: I called, but she was dancing barefoot on the lawn under the full moon. she hung up on me.

JED: *snort* WOMEN.

ABBY: *clears throat*

JED: what I meant to say was, have you spoken to Sam?

TOBY: on the other line, sir. I'll merge the calls.

SAM: good evening, sir. how are you feeling?

JED: I'm married to a doctor. I'm feeling nostalgic for the outdoors.

TOBY: the president thinks he should make a statement.

SAM: don't say "I told you so."

JED: I wasn't going to.

TOBY: *cough*

JED: I might have considered it.

TOBY: sir, CJ's calling. should I merge her in?

JED: yes, for god's sake.

CJ: (out of breath) good evening, sir.

JED: I heard you were dancing.

CJ: a little bit, sir.

JED: did you do the jackal?

CJ: It's the WAP now, sir.

JED: I hope the P stands for "Pope."

CJ: no, sir

JED: CJ, don't you think it's somewhat unseemly to dance when a man has contracted a dangerous virus?

CJ: can the First Lady hear me?

ABBY: I'm here.

CJ: Mrs. Bartlett, do you have some sort of music-playing device with you? I want you to look up an artist named Megan--

SAM: Abby, don't do what she's telling you to do.

ABBY: that's Dr. Bartlett. I'm looking, CJ.

JED: I believe we were talking about me.

TOBY: yes, sir. a statement. I still think it's a bad idea.

SAM: there's nothing to say that won't sound vindictive or false.

JED: what if I'm feeling vindictive?

TOBY: then that's all the more reason not to say anything.

JED: god, you lily-livered intellectual elites pain me sometimes.

TOBY: sir, you're a Nobel laureate.

JED: get Ainsley on the phone.

CJ: you know who she works for now, right?

AINSLEY: good evening, Mr. President. I imagine you're calling to gloat?

JED: you have a vivid imagination.

TOBY: he's calling for advice. he thinks he should make a statement.

AINSLEY: sir, I work for the Lincoln Project. I don't think it's right I advise you.

SAM: I do.

TOBY: you do?

SAM: sure. we're on the same team on this one.

AINSLEY: your making a statement might benefit us, and not you.

JED: what benefit am I worried about? I'm retired.

ABBY: your legacy.

JED: is secure.

ABBY: your children.

JED: are rich, grown, and happy.

SAM: he's thinking of saying "I told you so."

JED: it was just a first draft. Toby will write the real thing.

AINSLEY: you shouldn't appear vindictive.

SAM: that's what I said.

AINSLEY: something statesmanlike.

JED: I've been statesmanlike this whole time. I wore a mask.

ABBY: I made you wear a mask.

JED: Dr. Bartlett made me wear a mask. and in statesmanlike fashion, I obeyed my wife.

CJ: where are you planning to place this statement?

JED: I don't know. I hear Chuck Grassley found a messenger pigeon.

TOBY: the pigeon was dead, sir.

JED: oh. well I suppose it's not very good at its job, then.

TOBY: about as good as the postal service these days, sir.

JED: where would you suggest placing the statement, CJ?

CJ: I could give it to Danny.

JED: isn't he retired?

CJ: semi-retired. he freelances.

JED: Danny, then. all right. we can give it to Danny. Ainsley, what should I say?

AINSLEY: should I bring George in on this?

JED: Conway? no. he's a nincompoop. blows this way and that with the wind.

TOBY: well said, sir.

JED: I want your opinion, Ainsley, not your bosses'.

AINSLEY: well, I think you should say that although you disagree on many things, you know what it's like to experience an illness in office.

JED: that's soft. you don't want me to be soft on the guy.

SAM: it's smart, sir. never interrupt your opponent when he's losing votes.

TOBY: he's not our opponent. we don't have an opponent. if we had an opponent, Josh would be on this call!

JED: good point. Toby, get Josh on the call.

CJ: sir, Josh is--

JED: In Portland, yes. they have phones in anarchist jurisdictions, right?

TOBY: he's in jail, sir.

JED: an actual jail?

TOBY: as opposed to what kind?

JED: I don't know. some sort of mock U.N. thing, for kids.

AINSLEY: please don't put anything about mock jails in the statement, Mr. President.

SAM: why didn't Josh call me? I should be his phone call.

TOBY: he called me.

SAM: I'm his attorney!

TOBY: well, maybe he doesn't want to get out of jail just yet.

JED: I can't still pardon him, can I?

TOBY: no, sir.

JED: God, I miss it sometimes.

CJ: the presidency, sir?

JED: just the part where I could tell all of you to shut up and make it stick.

JOSH: good evening, sir.

JED: I thought you were in jail.

JOSH: I am in jail, sir. what can I do for you?

CJ: while Toby and Sam were busy arguing about who Josh should have called, I called the jail and asked for Josh.

JED: Josh, should I make a statement or not?

JOSH: you should make one rip-roaring hell of a statement.

JED: should I say "I told you so?"

JOSH: did you tell him so?

JED: I tried. he wouldn't return my calls.

JOSH: then no, that's lying.

JED: and you're going to tell me I only get to do that while in office, I suppose.

CJ: what if you just send your well-wishes to the youngest one?

JED: the tall one?

CJ: is that a dig at me?

TOBY: he really is quite tall.

AINSLEY: he's a child, sir. don't bring him in.

JOSH: well-wishes are "bringing him in?"

AINSLEY: in a statement to the press? yes.

JED: I suppose you're right. I won't wish him well. in fact, I'll wish him nothing at all.

TOBY: you could say you're feeling fortunate to have been well-advised while in office by health experts, including the First Lady.

JOSH: that'll just bring up M.S. comparisons.

SAM: how about you don't say anything about him at all?

TOBY: make it about the American people.

SAM: in a time of crisis—

CJ: *snorts* it's not a crisis, it's the first good news this year.

SAM: in a time of great uncertainty...

TOBY: a time of yearning for stability...

SAM: ...a time when America, stuck in a beleaguered present, longs for a mythical past and a promised future...

TOBY: ...it is clearer now than ever that today's challenges shape tomorrow's opportunities.

SAM: ...as a nation, we grieve deeply together, and we rise together.

TOBY: and—bear with me, sir—today's unprecedented trials remind me that America has yet to keep her founding promises to her citizens.

SAM: liberty. equality. prosperity. for too many American families, these ideals remain out of reach.

TOBY: my time to lead has passed.

SAM: today, I am proud to follow a new generation—a rising force that fights for what it believes in.

JOSH: hey. still in jail for fighting for what I believe in over here.

ABBY: maybe you're an honorary youth?

TOBY: we're riffing. please don't interrupt when we're riffing.

ABBY: that's "please don't interrupt, DR. Bartlett."

TOBY: yes, ma'am.

JED: say something about my children. Zoe's doing such great work at that awful socialist rag.

SAM: I am inspired most of all by my daughters, fearless in their devotion to their values and their nation.

TOBY: my time in the oval office affords me a unique vantage point from which to observe today's trials and tribulations.

SAM: and what I've observed most keenly is the unquenchable spirit of human kindness.

TOBY: presidents don't save lives. nurses and teachers do.

SAM: so when you ask me if I think the country can survive this current crisis?

TOBY: I think a country is not so much defined by those with the most power, but by those with the least.

SAM: the real business of America takes place not in the Oval Office, but in classrooms.

TOBY: and on street corners, where too many Americans, too many veterans, sleep at night.

SAM: and in the streets, where our youth are proud to march together and call for change.

TOBY: I know my successor in the White House will receive the best medical care in the world.

SAM: I only hope that—with the leadership of more citizens, and fewer politicians—there will come a day when I can say the same of every single mother, every newborn child, and every senior citizen.

TOBY: add a God Bless America, and you're done.

JED: CJ, did you get all that?

CJ: huh?

ABBY: you really should see this video CJ is showing me. it's really something. you say *you* did that dance?

CJ: well, not quite like they do it.

JED: please tell me someone wrote all that down.

AINSLEY: I did, sir. on tape.

JED: of course. the republican.

JOSH: you can't record this. you're in a two-party state.

AINSLEY: relax, I'm joking. I just took notes. I'll type them up for you.

JED: should I add something in about voting?

CJ: sir, if anyone hasn't decided whether or not to vote by this time, you won't sway them.

JED: so that's it. that's the statement. no well-wishes, but no I-told-you-so.

TOBY: that's the statement.

JED: Zoe will ask why I didn't give it to her.

CJ: you can't give Jacobin an exclusive, sir.

JED: well why the hell not?

CJ: because I already texted Danny.

JED: fine. we'll give it to Danny. but if there's any followup, Zoe gets it.

JOSH: you just called her publication a "socialist rag."

JED: and? she may be redder than a baboon's behind, but she's my daughter.

ABBY: Jed!

AINSLEY: it's okay, Ma'am. Presidents are coarse now.

JED: see? even the republican is on my side.

AINSLEY: we have very few decent sides to be on these days, sir.

JED: give that nutter Conway my regards. and trip his wife down the stairs for me, will you?

TOBY: you'll send CJ the final language?

AINSLEY: already did.

JED: excellent. now, if there's nothing else to do, I'm going back to bed.

SAM: sir, Josh is still in jail.

JED: call a nurse or a teacher to get him out. politicians and intellectuals are passé.

ABBY: wait! CJ, don't hang up. I need to know how to get one of these leotards.

CJ: planning to learn the WAP, ma'am?

JED: good-NIGHT everyone. *hangs up phone*

ABBY: I wasn't done!

JED: you don't secretly hate Christmas or anything, do you?

ABBY: You know I love Christmas.

JED: Let's go upstairs, Dr. Bartlett.

ABBY: Lead the way, Mr. President.

I feel like we need a "The End" here.

Seriously, though, wasn't that remarkable and delightful? Woehr has gotten a lot of well-deserved attention and praise for the imaginary reboot and says she's planning more for people who loved the thread. (Also, here's her LinkedIn profile because somebody in television seriously needs to hire her.)

Thanks for bringing a bit of The West Wing into the craziest part of 2020, Jelena! It's the levity and inspiration we didn't know we needed.



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posted by HDM News @ October 08, 2020   0 Comments

Thursday, 1 October 2020

Parents are struggling to explain the presidential debate to their children



The first time I watched a presidential debate as a young adult, I was surprised by what a far cry it was from my middle school debate class—and not in a good way. I saw almost nothing of what I'd learned about constructing a valid argument, forming a refutation, cross-examination or any other debate skill on the presidential debate stage, and I was confused. Why did I have to learn those rules and guidelines if the people competing for the highest office in the nation didn't even use them in a nationally televised debate?

That was my impression during the "normal" era of politics. This week's presidential debate dropped the bar so low we might as well call it six feet under. I'm not sure if we hit rock bottom, but it feels like we're darn close.

My two teens watched the presidential debate with me. Normally, I would have grabbed this opportunity to discuss with them the issues presented to the candidates, point out the ways politicians use language to make their policies sound good, and how they frame things to make their opponents' policies look bad. I would have walked them through an analysis of the debate, probably lamenting the lack of formal debate practices—that's nothing new—but still discussing the nuances of what made each candidate's performance weaker or stronger. I wouldn't have tried to steer their opinions of the candidates one way or the other, but allowed them to evaluate on their own.

This debate offered no such opportunities. It was a train wreck, and there's no getting around the fact that it was a train wreck because the President of the United States made it one.

And it saddens me as much as it enrages me. I want my children to be able to respect the president. Even if they disagree with his policies, even if they think he's in the wrong on various issues, I want them to be able to respect the leader of our country as a leader.

But they can't. I can't. And that sucks.

To watch the President of the United States engage in behavior that I wouldn't tolerate in a 5-year-old is humiliating and impossible to explain to my children. My husband and I have worked to instill into them the values of common courtesy and basic decency. We've taught them to carefully consider different opinions and viewpoints and to evaluate them fairly and honestly, and always treat others with respect and compassion.

They're teens and they're smart—they saw the aggression and rudeness and complete lack of decorum with their own eyes and formed their own appalled responses. But what about younger kids? The ones who are just forming their ideas about leadership and true strength and acceptable behavior—the ones for whom this man is the only presidential example they've known?

Parents have shared how some of their children reacted to the debate, and it's heartbreaking. How can we be proud of our country when the president makes children cry because he's a big ol' bully?





Those reactions are totally understandable. I'm 45 years old, and I flipped back and forth between wanting to cry and wanting to throw my TV set out the window. We are going through a huge ordeal as a nation, with a global pandemic and economic struggles and social upheaval creating a great deal of uncertainty. The last thing we need is a leader that makes our children feel unsafe simply by opening his mouth.

I know there are people who think that basic decency and reasonably good character are not necessary qualities in a president, and that nothing matters but certain issues or certain policies, but I 100% disagree. The president is the leader of our nation. The president is the individual face representing our nation among all the world's leaders. Are we really going to make the argument that literal leaders shouldn't be expected to behave with dignity—especially when the whole world is watching? Are we really going to say it's not a huge problem for the president to embarrass our nation with behavior we'd never tolerate in our own children? Really?

"This isn't normal," I had to keep telling my kids. "There's usually some interrupting and some contention in a presidential debate, but not like this. This is awful and unacceptable." I had nothing else. I've never been so embarrassed to be an American.

I guess the one silver lining is that the debate did give us the opportunity to talk about how to handle a bully, what abusive manipulation looks like, and the difficult position Chris Wallace found himself in. But the fact that a presidential debate became a discussion on bullying and abuse is the entire problem in and of itself. This is not the America I want for my children. No policy or issue is worth this humiliation.



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posted by HDM News @ October 01, 2020   0 Comments

Thursday, 10 September 2020

Dad transforms the garage into a 'real' school classroom for his daughter—teacher and all



Parents, teachers, and students have had to dig deep into their creativity and flexibility as back-to-school time hits, pandemic-style. From Zoom classes to hybrid models to plexiglass desk barriers, school simply does not—and cannot—look normal in 2020.

I've seen many parents fret over how and where their kids will do their online schooling. Do they need a desk? What about a quiet space? What if we don't have separate rooms for each kid? And those are just the worries about space.

With everyone's concern levels being sky high, it's no wonder the reactions to one dad's school-at-home setup were mixed. A Reddit user shared this video to the r/nextfuckinglevel subreddit, and while we don't know who the dad is, his classroom building skills truly are next level.

Father converted his garage into a classroom for his daughter www.youtube.com

But not everyone agreed over whether or not it's a good thing.

Clearly there's no question that this dad cares. Fathers who don't take their parenting responsibility don't do things like this.

But some people remarked that, while impressive, the classroom also felt "dystopian," "apocalyptic," and "creepy." Some responded that, umm yeah, we're kind of in a global pandemic here. Others pointed out that this setup may actually be better than what some government-funded schools have.

A couple of commenters explained in detail what was good about this dad's efforts:

zeke-apex wrote:

"For the people that don't understand why this is praiseworthy: The environment is supposed to emulate what she is used to. We don't know this family's situation, so for all we know there could be a bunch of people in and out of the house all day, causing a distraction to the child, thus being detrimental to her learning. Imo too much comfortability in a learning space can be bad because it encourages laziness. There could be a million reasons for why he did what he did. Going above and beyond for his child and her learning is deserving of all the praise. This man is a great father."

Gangreless chimed in with:

"I can't believe how shitty the comments are here. This is some terrific parenting and is such a great way to help his daughter adjust to remote learning. It's also fantastic that she's able to have a dedicated, quiet space without distractions to learn. People forget that kids go to school for 7 to 8 hours a day, it's literally a job, and they deserve the same environment that you'd expect to have in a home office."

Most agreed that the dad should be praised for his efforts, but some also pointed out that while this setup is great, it also highlights the privilege some families have. There are lots of kids for whom nothing like this is even remotely possible, either because of money or space limitations. That doesn't mean this dad shouldn't do it, but it's a reminder that the pandemic is only serving to widen the gap between those with means and those with need.

At any rate, kudos to this dad for trying to make pandemic schooling a little better for his daughter. We all need all the help we can get to make it through this.



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posted by HDM News @ September 10, 2020   0 Comments

An adorable grandma casually came out to her granddaughter while talking about relationships



As society has become more accepting of LGBTQ people, the average age people come out of the closet has dropped significantly, from 37 among those in their 60s to 21 for those in their 30s.

However, many people, especially those who are older, are never able to come out because of societal or familial pressures.

An adorable new video that went viral on TikTok shows it's never too late to be your true self. A woman named Aimee was having a conversation with her grandmother — who she assumed was straight — when she admitted to being attracted to women.

Aimee thought it was so important that she had to capture the conversation on video.

Aimee wanted to know if it was just a sisterly love or sexual attraction. "Do you like prefer women's bodies?" Aimee asked.

"I think so, yeah" the grandmother answered. "I think boobs are nice. I think the penis, not that keen on it," she said with a grimace.

Aimee asked her grandmother what age the perfect woman would be and she said, "late 60s," and Aimee jokingly called her a "cougar."

"I just like women anyhow," the grandma said. "I've never liked men that much."

However, Aimee's grandma isn't quite ready to hit the dating scene yet. "At the moment Aimee, all I want to do is survive," she admitted.



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posted by HDM News @ September 10, 2020   0 Comments

21 of the funnies photos from the Comedy Wildlife Awards



A sense of humor is a characteristic that many of us assume is only found among humans. However, according to Live Science, our primate relatives — chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans — all produce laughter-like sounds when tickled.

Koko, the gorilla that knew sign language, would tie her trainer's shoes together, sign, "chase," and then laugh.

So, who knows? Ants and spiders may share their own jokes that we have no idea about. And it'd be hard for a giraffe or puffer fish not to laugh from time to time given their looks.

Don't get me started on hyenas.

The photographers and wildlife conservationists from the Comedy and Wildlife Awards do a great job that humans aren't the only animals that enjoy having a laugh.

Every year, they hand out an award to the funniest wildlife photo and they've just released their top 44 finalists for the 2020 awards. So, we're sharing our top 21 favorites.

The winners will be announced on October 22 with the top photographer winning an incredible one-week safari with Alex Walker's Serian in the Masai Mara, Kenya as well as a unique handmade trophy from the Art Garage in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania.

What's your favorite photo? You can vote on the People's Choice winner on their website.

Here are 21 of our favorite finalists.

Wait up mommy, look what I got for you© Kunal Gupta / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Just chillin'© Jill Neff / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Untitled© Mark Fitzpatrick / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


It's the last day of school holidays© Max Teo / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Hide and seek© Tim Hearn / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Socially uninhibited© Martin Grace / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Boredom© Marcus Westberg / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Macaque striking a pose© Louis Marti / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


The inside joke© Femke van Willigen / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Hi y'all© Erik Fisher / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Crashing into the picture© Brigette Alclay Marcon / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Smiley© Arthur Telle Thiermann / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Social distance, please© Petr Sochmanmn / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


The race© Yevhen Samuchenko / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


So hot© Wei Ping Pen / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Monkey business© Megan Lawrenz / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


I think this tires gonna be flat© Kay Kotzian / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Peekaboo© Jagdeep Rajput / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Almost time to get up© Charlie Davidson / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


I could puke© Christina Holfelder / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.


Spreading the wildlife gosspi© Bernhard Esterer / Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2020.



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posted by HDM News @ September 10, 2020   0 Comments